Comments on: Speaking of Relationship: Sex is the Key http://tadias.wordpress.com/2007/02/06/speaking-of-relationship-sex-is-the-key/ The Leading Ethiopian-American Lifestyle and Business Publication Tue, 20 Mar 2007 17:38:52 +0000 http://wordpress.com/ hourly 1 By: Shannon http://tadias.wordpress.com/2007/02/06/speaking-of-relationship-sex-is-the-key/#comment-70 Shannon Tue, 20 Mar 2007 17:38:52 +0000 http://tadias.wordpress.com/2007/02/06/speaking-of-relationship-sex-is-the-key/#comment-70 This article is general but accurate. Dr. Aberra wants to point out what most women don't want to talk about. What we do behind closed doors is our secret. A marriage is a 2-way street. We both have to give and receive a little and change always happens. Dr. Aberra is not putting men down when she says that the "main" reason for men to marry is to have sex when they want. They love us but they also can't help the way they "feel". Just like we can't help the way that we "feel". My husband says that it's a "curse". As his wife, I do not want him to find it else where and I feel that I need to fulfill his need just like he fulfills mine when I want to have a romantic dinner and go to see a "chick flick" or when I'm tired and he cooks dinner for our family or when I am just to tired for IT. As long as "we" work together in this marriage and help each other fulfill our needs, I'm hoping that we can live a long life "together". I can only go by what I see. Half of my family has had marital problems and it ALL had to do with "sex". Thank you Dr. Aberra for putting it out there. This article is general but accurate. Dr. Aberra wants to point out what most women don’t want to talk about. What we do behind closed doors is our secret. A marriage is a 2-way street. We both have to give and receive a little and change always happens. Dr. Aberra is not putting men down when she says that the “main” reason for men to marry is to have sex when they want. They love us but they also can’t help the way they “feel”. Just like we can’t help the way that we “feel”. My husband says that it’s a “curse”. As his wife, I do not want him to find it else where and I feel that I need to fulfill his need just like he fulfills mine when I want to have a romantic dinner and go to see a “chick flick” or when I’m tired and he cooks dinner for our family or when I am just to tired for IT. As long as “we” work together in this marriage and help each other fulfill our needs, I’m hoping that we can live a long life “together”. I can only go by what I see. Half of my family has had marital problems and it ALL had to do with “sex”. Thank you Dr. Aberra for putting it out there.

]]> By: Nancy http://tadias.wordpress.com/2007/02/06/speaking-of-relationship-sex-is-the-key/#comment-60 Nancy Sun, 11 Mar 2007 18:52:00 +0000 http://tadias.wordpress.com/2007/02/06/speaking-of-relationship-sex-is-the-key/#comment-60 I think the points in this article are limited and generalized. There are many purposes for marriage. People evolve and "agreements" require re-negotiation. To say it is "wrong" in describing marriage as hard is both inaccurate and demeaning to the challenges that many couples are faced with. It is never easy when some change direction and another is perfectly content with things as they are; or someone becomes dependent and the other has a need for movement. I would also disagree that men go into marriage simply for the availability of sex. That statement paints a picture that men are shallow and only have needs limited to their body. Many men marry for companionship, self-actualization and desire for family; many women marry expecting a fulfilling sexual relationship. I think the points in this article are limited and generalized. There are many purposes for marriage. People evolve and “agreements” require re-negotiation. To say it is “wrong” in describing marriage as hard is both inaccurate and demeaning to the challenges that many couples are faced with. It is never easy when some change direction and another is perfectly content with things as they are; or someone becomes dependent and the other has a need for movement. I would also disagree that men go into marriage simply for the availability of sex. That statement paints a picture that men are shallow and only have needs limited to their body. Many men marry for companionship, self-actualization and desire for family; many women marry expecting a fulfilling sexual relationship.

]]> By: Nolawi http://tadias.wordpress.com/2007/02/06/speaking-of-relationship-sex-is-the-key/#comment-56 Nolawi Tue, 06 Mar 2007 23:45:31 +0000 http://tadias.wordpress.com/2007/02/06/speaking-of-relationship-sex-is-the-key/#comment-56 Interesting input Doc, and for the most part I agree <blockquote>Times have changed. The 21st century has leveled the playing field so that the only thing a husband and a wife require from each other is companionship. The one element that will not be equalized, however, is a husband’s need to go to his wife for sex. Therefore, a husband comes into a marriage, having lost all his bargaining power, with a promise of one thing and one thing only: sexual companionship</blockquote> my only problem is with that you used sex as what a woman has over a man. I think a woman also need sex. The playing field although not completely level is more balanced that you made it appear to be.... Interesting input Doc, and for the most part I agree

Times have changed. The 21st century has leveled the playing field so that the only thing a husband and a wife require from each other is companionship. The one element that will not be equalized, however, is a husband’s need to go to his wife for sex. Therefore, a husband comes into a marriage, having lost all his bargaining power, with a promise of one thing and one thing only: sexual companionship

my only problem is with that you used sex as what a woman has over a man. I think a woman also need sex. The playing field although not completely level is more balanced that you made it appear to be….

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